MALE DISPOSABILITY – What is male disposability? And what keeps it going?

What is male disposability and what is behind it? Short answer: 1) Male disposability is the belief that males are disposable for the good of their families and societies, and for  women, in a way that females are not and 2) it makes a culture more successful in war and at grabbing resources.

Male disposability is a cultural value that says that men and only men should sacrifice thier lives and health and emotional well-being for the good of the family or community, and should be happy doing this, and should be ridiculed, condemned and even jailed if they refuse in some way. Male disposability is part of the male gender role in some but not all cultures, and I have yet to see and adequate explanation for that.

So that’s male disposability. What gives rise to it? Why does it exist and what good if any comes of it?

The standard explanation is the rare egg theory. Girl Writes What describes male disposability as a cultural response to the biological fact that eggs are scarce while sperm are not, that males are disposable because there is an infinite supply of sperm but a finite supply of eggs, which have to be husbanded carefully. There are two problems with this explanation.

First – egg scarcity is a matter of biology, so male disposability should be standard across all cultures, and it’s not. People recognize this in the form of rather unflattering stereotypes. “Hey, want to buy some Italian Army rifles – only been dropped once.” This variation has to be explained, and a biological reality common to all human societies won’t do it.

Second – the egg scarcity explanation relies on the fast that a woman has a finite supply of eggs, but ignores that there is an almost infinite supply of women. The fact is that throughout history men of one group have gone out and killed men of another group, to take their land perhaps or whatever other reason, and the women of that second group have been taken into the first group as secondary wives or some other kind of dependent. Because men are the primary victims of war, war has always meant an over-abundance of women among the survivors. Look at this chart for the population structure in Germany. Note that at the very upper end of the chart, 80 years and older, there is a conspicuous imbalance between the percentages of men and women. That’s the generation that came through WWII. I am sure the same chart for Afghanistan, if it were possible to anything like complete data, would look pretty similar for the male cohort 15-30 years old. So perhaps eggs are not quite so scarce, relative to the population of available men, as we assume they are,

The scarce egg explanation presupposes lifelong monogamy. Lifelong monogamy, for time out of mind, was not really an option even when it was desired – women died young, and all the time, and they had to be replaced, because until very recently, a woman’s labor was irreplaceable unless you had servants. There’s a reason for the Wicked Stepmother trope in folktales – everyone had a stepmother sooner or later.

Of course there were always more women, since daughters either married and moved out or stayed home unmarried for their brothers to support along with their wives, while unmarried brothers either stayed and added their labor to running the farm or moved on down the road for lives as day laborers.

Back to male disposability and how some cultures manifest it so much more than others. What’s going on, why the variety across cultures? Does male disposability have some adaptive value that applies for some cultures and not so much in others? It’s hard to see what benefit it would offer in stable farming cultures, but it has it has obvious adaptive value where the males have to be disposable, as in economies based on long-rage fishing or trade or on raiding and other firms of warfare. And there’s the real engine of male disposability – it is not just adaptive to certain specific challenges certain cultures face, but it is quite advantageous to any culture in conflict with another over resources or territory.

The real payoff with male disposability is success in war – and in the colonialism and imperialism that war enables. Anyone who promotes any aspect of the psychological edifice that is male disposability is enabling warfare, colonial domination and imperialism. Any aspect.

THIS IS WHAT SEXUAL ENTITLEMENT LOOKS LIKE… White men , Asian women and the white women who hate them

In a post from a long time ago, unrelated to the actual topic of the post, a very interesting discussion of sexual ownership developed. (This is why I cherish thread drift, by the way.)The issue was the way white women treat – judging, sneering, accusing – white men who are in romantic relationships with non-white women, especially Asian women.*  Fairly late in the thread Mike explains:

Mike on said:

……..“It’s funny, because when my friend offered to introduce me to a “nice Cambodian lady”, I told him that she should be “at least” 35, so we’d have some kind of continuity in terms of age. I initially met Jen online and she told me she was 35. Over a webcam it’s often hard to tell, but I had no reason to doubt her.”

“As for the looks my wife and I get in public, it’s been an eye-opener. Yes, I always knew that there were people who found time to care about this stuff but being the recipient of their attention wasn’t something I’d had a lot of direct exposure to.

The sneers we get (well, that *I* get) are almost palpable, lol. Eventually after several months I mentioned this to my wife; she was mostly unaware of it, but after I mentioned it she started seeing it too. The “up-and-down” look done at the same time as the lip curls into an expression of mild-to-blatant disapproval.

Some of it is a built-in prejudice based on a combination of age difference and apparent attractiveness. Let me be honest: I’m no damn movie star, and GQ is *not* going to be breaking down my door for a photo shoot anytime soon. I mean, I don’t have to sneak up on a mirror, but I’m no hunk. My wife, on the other hand, is way more beautiful than I deserve. And somehow, this seems unfair to them- because the fact is that there is no white, American woman anywhere near as cute as my wife who would ever date, let alone marry, a guy like me. (I’d be lucky if I could get them to spit on me.) So they look at us and they’re like “WTF??”

This condemnation of white men and Asian women in romantic relationships is nothing new. I remember this attitude from my childhood, the sense that these men were preying on these women, exploiting them in some way. Nowadays this is often expressed in accusations that these men are looking for a “subservient Asian woman” as a form of sexist dominance. That accusation is simultaneously sexist and racist.

It is sexist because it presumes the white men are making all the moves and making all the choices, and then condemning them for it. It trades in hyperagency and hypoagency.

It is racist because iIt is a plain expression of white supremacy, in two ways. First, it casts the whire men as some kind of all-poweful predators, and second, it casts white women as the default object of white men’s attractions, so that if a white man is attracted to an Asian woman there must be something nefarious power or deviant about it.

Mike was following up on an earlier comment:

 Mike on said:

The whole “mail order bride” syndrome you mention, is still open for criticism and comment.

Oh, tell me about it. :(

As if I selected her from a catalog and paid for overnight shipping (so she’d still be fresh when she got here!) It’s astoundingly offensive, and honestly, I think a lot of the “mail order bride” comments stem from jealousy (although some probably come from simple ignorance).”

As far as I am concerned the ignorance comes out of jealousy, because it is obviously self-serving.

 Some other comments in the discussion: 

Paul on said:

“You know, I look at all these women who are yelling about “yellow fever” and I honestly wonder how many of them have (or have had) black boyfriends.

I used to have this friend when I was a young’un (as in middle/high school) who was… well, proud, frankly, about the fact that she refused to date white men. (She herself was blonde’n’blueyed) Her ahem “preference” was for latino men (and she did eventually marry a man who is latino, never met him though) although I seem to recall her saying she’d be willing to date black men as well.

It just goes back to the whole “men have nasty ‘fetishes’ women have ‘preferences’” thing.”

And also:

Paul on said:

“Actually, now that I think of it, this applies to a lot more things than just race.

Society apparently tells women that the “pinnacle” of beauty is a white woman, preferably blonde and blue-eyed, who’s skinny with big breasts and somewhere between say 5’3 and 5’6 give or take an inch.

Women say that this being seen as the end all and be all of beauty is wrong (and you’ll get no argument from me on that point)

And yet… apparently if any man expresses any desires that *do* fall outside these qualities… he’s told he’s “fetishizing” and “objectifying” How exactly do they expect to widen the scope of “attractive” when every time men tell them that we don’t believe in that ideal any more than they do, we’re told to “stop fetishizing”?

 The stink of sexual ownership and sexual entitlement and sexist double standards hovers over this entire issue. Of course their sense of sexual ownership of white men is covered up and presented as white women protecting their non-white sisters. they still expect people to fall for that, even though POC feminists and womanists can tell you all about white women’s solicitude for non-white women.

And the final comment on the matter sums everything with the voice of humanity and clear, sweet reason. and it also happens to employ “flip the genders” and “flip the races” to show how offensive this sense of sexual ownership is:

Jo on said: Edit

as a mixed race woman (black/white) I prefer white men with brown hair. Always have since I was a little girl. I don’t know why I just do. Men are free to prefer whoever they like, its neither racist nor sexist, its a preference. I am open to other experiences and have fallen in love with different types but it just so happened that I married my preference. Black people have said that I was racist. Black men in particular have been offended by me and my preference, they said that I thought I was ‘too good for them’ etc. I don’t object to personal preference. I object to the only value of women being placed on their youth, skinniness and blondness as a cultural NORM/IDEAL. It is not. I hate that men and women are ridiculed for finding other types attractive. And funnily enough the men I am attracted to are the cultural NORM/IDEAL (tall, dark) If I was a man and prefered skinny blonde women I’m sure the venom would be profound. It doesn’t make it wrong, it makes it wrong that there is a cutural NORM that is forced upon us by the media. There should be a better representation of everyone, it would take the heat off us all and allow us to like who we damn please.

I am very familiar with being who I could be attracted and much worse, being told who I could not be attracted to, and I have to litle patience with that bigoted, self-serving idiocy to engage with it even to the point of bothering to answer it. It doesn’t deserve an answer.

Matha Nussbaum identified ownership explicitly as a form of objectification. That’s what this herd-tending and moral judginess is on the par tof these white women. It is objectification.

 

*I have learned to clarify for our non-US readers that in the US “Asian” means “East Asian”. Desi don’t register as ”Asian” for most Americans.

DAMSELING – Pity Pumping

Pity pumping is a tactic that increases victim cred. To use it you first have to have victim cred to increase. If you don’t, if for instance you belong to a group that is designated as non-victims or non-victimizable, it will backfire. You won’t increase your victim cred you don’t have to begin with, you’ll just get labeled pathetic and some way to blame you for your plight will be found or invented. But if you are in a recognized victim group it often works very smoothly. In fact it’s nearly effortless.

Let’s look at some forms of pity pumping.

Portray an extreme example as a modal example – For while about ten years ago it was fashionable to brandish the statistic that murder was a major cause, or even the leading cause, of death in pregnant women. It accounted for more deaths among pregnant women than any medical problem with the pregnancy. Of course no actual numbers of these deaths versus others were ever mentioned because then it would have been obvious how few pregnant women die from any cause, medical or otherwise. Patriarchal medicine has seen to that. And publishing actual numbers of murders of pregnant women would allow the reader to compare these numbers to the statistics on male murder victims, and that would have defeated the whole purpose of the exercise.

But leaving in the realm of percentages and expressions of outrage allowed the moral entrepreneurs waving this red shirt to play on people’s normal instinctual protectiveness toward pregnant women. It fed the domestic violence narrative they were pushing.

Sly inversion – In this form of pity pumping you portray a harm to your victim group as greater than much worse harm to a non-victim group. An example of this is claiming that rape is worse than murder, that the victims suffer more. Another is the standard claim that the fact that war is institutionalized violence against men is really misogyny in disguise because it reflects a sexist consensus that women are not fit go off to die, because being considered unfit to die is like so much worse than actually dying. Another example of this was the way the Women’s Liberation movement portrayed the being a housewife as some form of oppression. Betty Friedan actually compared the lot of the housewife to that of a death camp inmate, saying they were both progressively dehumanized. She was speaking of American housewives in the 1950s living in what to the vast majority of humanity would consider a rather privileged position, certainly compared to that of their Man in The Grey Flannel Suit husbands who have all died off by now, years before these oppressed darlings.

See what Friedan did there? She exaggerated and misrepresented a life of relative privilege and thereby implicitly distorted and erased these women’s men’s lives of relative disprivilege – work that shortened their lives, denied them parenting time, required mindless conformity, based on an ethic of male disposability.

SlogansRebecca West’s formulation “Feminism is the radical notion that women are people.” is an example of pity pumping. “[Daddy!] look! They don’t even think I’m a person!!!!” Sob, sob, sob…….

Motherhood – The prime target for pity pumping, the dark heart of Mother McCree sentimentality about women, is motherhood and the way men, mostly idolize motherhood. And it can be exploited to very good effect. Yes, it’s ultimately misogynist and a part of patriarchal oppression and feminists have denounced it since the 70s – and still are, thank you, Mary Elizabeth Williams, than you very much for shredding this particular piece of sexist bullshit – but that hasn’t stopped feminists from insisting on the trope and exploiting it since before the 70s and right up to the present day. You see this in discussions of abortion and parental surrender, you see it in discussions of who gets primary child custody – “But, but, she CARRIED that child in her own body!!!” -  although this seems to be waning – good – and you see it in discussions of the “wage gap” and why women work fewer hours than men. They answer is not more but better feminism.

So that’s pity pumping. And I am avidly collecting more examples.

 

FEMALE PRIVILEGE – A the Ladies’ Auxiliary of the Patriarchy

An article appeared over at Thoughtcatalog listing various obvious forms of female privilege with a completely predictable comment section. Althought the denialism was completely predictable, some commenters pushed back.

The comments criticizing the article were a display case of hyopoagency, gynocentric special pleading, erasure and tradtional gender stereotypes. And of course there was the obligatory white-knighty non-responsive attempt at a rebuttal in a later post.

David Bryon, who posts really insightful and solid arguments all over the gendersphere where he is not banned, made some really important points about this denialism and then later a commenter named Sarah Stuart made the key point.

 You should go read the whole thread to get the context of these comments, but I think they stand alone well enough to quote here.

DavidByron • a day ago

Hysterical ad hominem attacks are exactly how you’d expect women and feminists to react if indeed women are the privileged sex. They have the power, therefore entering a debate is irrational. They know they can win by the use of force. Men’s rights advocates know they can win if the battle is of logic and an appeal to morals.

Nobody who advocates for any oppressed minority can be surprised at this sort of reaction from the entitled and privileged.

Privilege doesn’t give up it’s (sic) power just because people ask nicely.

But that is exactly what we are supposed to believe happened with feminism. We are supposed to believe that women were always oppressed and yet the first time women asked for their rights, they were simply given it. That has never happened to any genuinely oppressed group ever. Women were given extra rights because they already enjoyed power. They had the power of being the protected sex, the cared for sex, the innocent sex. Feminists simply reframed their goals in terms of a new way to protect women, and society quickly set about fulfilling those new protections. As soon as the majority of women changed their mind and saw the vote as something that would protect women, instead of seeing it as something that would harm women, male legislators GAVE them the vote. They gained more privilege, based on the privileges they already had.

If feminists had demanded that women be protected LESS (to be equal to men) they would have had a genuinely radical movement, but feminists didn’t demand that because they didn’t want equality. That is how we have feminists today demanding more and more protections for women while women are, and always have had more protections. That is how feminists can unironically claim women suffer more from violence even though men are the majority of victims.

The easiest way to demand more and more power for themselves was to create a bogeyman that would menace women. A bogeyman that they could point to and say, “See? Women need to have more and more rights because of this terrible threat!” And so feminists set about systematically demonizing men as rapists, violently “oppressing” women. They created a conspiracy theory that said all men collaborate to keep all women down.

If “patriarchy” was real then feminism would never have succeeded without a fight.

The irony is the cry of “patriarchy” only works for feminists because our society is the exact opposite of a patriarchy. Our society is dedicated to protecting women so much that even completely irrational claims of danger towards women must be taken seriously.

Feminism is the political equivalent of a woman standing on a chair screaming for her husband to crush a bug for her. It’s a completely irrational claim of danger. And it works because society has always worked to protect women.

Ladies’ Auxiliary of the Patriarchy: Then an interesting exchange developed that ended up illustrating a major claim of the MRM, that feminism is just patriarchy repackaged:

llpk • a day ago

Most of those problems are effects of patriarchy, not female privilege. Do you want to know why there are fewer resources for men fighting domestic violence? Because it it deemed unmanly to be a victim. Who created the image of masculinity in our society? Men (as a group). It is often the same men who complain about these lacking services that also degrade men for needing the services.

 

Men created the image of masculinity in our society? All on our own? Women had nothing to do with it? No gay shaming, no real man narrative; women had no hand in any of this, according to llpk.. Women don’t raise children and socialize them according to llpk. The hand that rocks the cradle does not rule the world, apparently.

 

DavidByron >llpk • 21 hours ago

The reason there are fewer resources for men in the USA is that feminists fought hard for laws (VAWA) that made it illegal to help male victims of domestic violence.

Feminists also spread the fiction that men are not often victims of domestic violence by burring the results of hundreds of pieces of research of four decades that said DV was an equal opportunity crime.

Feminists also successfully sold all DV as partner violence, thereby hiding violence against children and elders, which is mostly committed by women. They did this to spread their hateful lies that denigrate men as evil violent scum always hurting innocent women.

The VAWA was the single biggest victory of feminism in the 1990s, and it was hate.

So please stop guessing at why things happened if you don’t know the facts. It’s true that the sort of anti-male thinking that you mention probably greased the wheels for feminists to lobby for those laws. Traditional gender roles are used and enhanced by feminists in working to denigrate men.

 And the very predictable reaction – a change of misogyny and anger:

 RocketGrrl >DavidByron • 18 hours ago

You seem to have a lot of anger towards women and feminists. Amusingly. I don’t know any feminists that hate or even dislike men. Including myself. Fighting for equal treatment and respect is extremely important.

 Rocketgrrl either doesn’t know of Mary Daly, Andrea Dworkin, Jesica Valenti or Amanda Marcotte, or Adel Mercier; or else she doesn’t consider them feminists.

In any case, Code Red and Code Black aren’t working like they used to:

DavidByron >RocketGrrl • 13 hours ago

Are (sic) the classic “you must hate women if you disagree with feminism”

I have given many examples of feminists lobbying for anti-male discrimination.

I have challenged you to give even one example of a feminist program or victory or slogan that portrays men in a positive light.

And Commenter edtastic takes it right back to Rocketgrrl:

edtastic >RocketGrrl • 14 hours ago

You must have a lot of anger towards men because you set out to demonize men for caring about men. The anger toward feminists is fully justified by the attack on men’s equal rights and hateful social campaigns against men being waged by feminists.

“I don’t know any feminists that hate or even dislike men. Including myself.”

That’s your own self serving bias talking and we need look no further than things like the ‘white feather campaign’ pretending men aren’t even victims of domestic violence or ‘Don’t be that guy’ presuming all sexual violence perpetrators are males. Men needn’t be warm towards women who adopt an ideology that sets out to bash males and deny their pain.
see more

And David Byron also knows how to turn feminist jargon on them:

DavidByron >llpk • a day ago

Victim blaming.

Now comes the coup de grace. Thank you, Sarah Stuart.

 Sarah Stuart >llpk • 18 hours ago

So, it’s deemed “unmanly” to be a victim. That point of view is apparently part of the patriarchy. Feminists regularly attack men for being concerned about levels of male victims and they need to “man up” and focus on women. So feminists are perpetuating the patriarchy.

It all falls into place. Like the energy companies trying to “help” people reduce costs while boosting up prices, feminism is a monster that hurts and hurts to feed itself.

Edtastic sums up and closes:

edtastic >llpk • 14 hours ago

In that case feminism an effect of the patriarchy and clearly dependent on it to sustain it’s (sic) victim narratives through endless ‘patriarchy’ scapegoating.

” Do you want to know why there are fewer resources for men fighting domestic violence?”

Feminist covering up male victimization rates 30-40 years.

” Who created the image of masculinity in our society?”

BOTH SEXES!

“Men (as a group). It is often the same men who complain about these lacking services that also degrade men for needing the services.”

You are collectively blaming men as a sex because you don’t expect to be held accountable for your sexism against men. Meanwhile you see MRA’s keep their focus on feminists like you who engage in blatant sexism, misandry, and gender bashing to gain power over others. Who needs moral guidance on gender equality from people who can’t stop negatively stereotyping the male gender?

 It is getting more and more common to see this kind of push back and to see it in more and more spaces. It is also getting more and more common to see more and more women doing it.

Even as MRAs are derided or slandered more and more, the message is spreading. It is spreading partly due to the Streisand Effect, but mostly it is spreading because people are seeing the validity in it on its own merits and going on the spread it themselves.

Feminist Rape Culture: Statutory Edition

http://youtu.be/PBNQPJ0UTCg

On this past thursday, march 27, Dr Janice Fiamego gave a talk at At Queens University in Toronto, Canada titled: What’s Equality Got To Do With it? Men’s Issues and Feminism’s Double Standards

During that talk she was heckled by feminists. Afterward the first person who spoke during the question and answer period was one Adele Mercier, feminist philosophy professor at Queens University.

Remember that name. Adele Mercier. She makes a reappearance later on in this story.

Here’s what she had to say at that lecture.

In a letter to the editor of Queen’s University Newspaper Andrew Howard says the following:

Men should seek to work within the existing framework of moderate feminist institutions in order to advance their cause.

In the comments section of that article, I posted my short list of statistics indicating that female sexual predation of men and boys was a significant issue and one that is completely ignored by all feminist rape “awareness” campaigns to date. Instead feminist “awareness” campaigns such as the Don’t Be that Guy campaign prefer to paint men and boys as more likely to be predators that victims.

Adele Mercier joined in by “rebutting” my statistics.

The exchange felt like scenes from a horror movie.

First it started out creepy. For a professor of philosophy, Adele certainly is incapable of framing a rational rebuttal on this issue.

Tension ramped. Adele certainly is invested in erasing and excusing female predators!

Then the horrifying climax.

Let me read the final rebuttal Adele offered to my statistics detailing the high rate of female sexual predation on men and boys.

This rebuttal is in response to the statistic I mentioned that approximately 90-95% of boys in juvenile detention facilities who are abused by staff report a female abuser.

Dear Alison,

I know that statistics can be hard to interpret, but you need to learn to read before you spread misinformation into the stratosphere.

You said: “95% of abused boys in juvenile facilities reported being attacked/coerced by female staff”. This is FALSE.

Re-read Google “Sexual Victimization in Juvenile Facilities Reported by Youth, 2012”

“Sexual victimization” is there defined as ALL SEXUAL ACTIVITY with facility staff.

And the numbers are that, among males in juvenile facilities:

5.2% of MALE YOUTH engage in unauthorized sexual activity with MALE STAFF;

89.1% of MALE YOUTH engage in unauthorized sexual activity with FEMALE STAFF;

3% of MALE YOUTH engage in unauthorized sexual activity with both male and female staff.

This merely reflects THE PROPORTIONS OF GAY AND STRAIGHT MALES in juvenile detention centers, (and the fact that even people in detention centers like to have sex.)

Also noteworthy:

“As a result of the high rate of staff sexual misconduct reported in the NSYC-1 (10.3%), new items were added to the NSYC-2 questionnaire to better understand the circumstances surrounding incidents. Youth were asked a series of questions related to their relationship with the facility staff prior to sexual contact. Among victims of staff
sexual misconduct:

Nearly two-thirds said that staff told them about their personal life outside of work (69.1%), treated them like a favorite or better than other youth (63.6%), or gave them a special gift that the staff would not have given to most other youth (62.3%). Almost half (49.2%) said the staff member gave them pictures or wrote them letters. Nearly a third (29.8%) said that the staff member contacted them in other ways when the staff member was not at the facility. More than a third (36.7%) said youth gave the staff member pictures of themselves, and more than a quarter (28.1%) said youth gave the staff member a special gift.

When youth were asked who initiated the sexual contact, 36.4% said that the facility staff always made the first move, 17.4% reported that the youth always made the first move, and 46.3% said that sometimes the facility staff made the first move and sometimes the youth did.

Youth were also asked to describe the sexual relationship with staff. Nearly half (46.3%) said the incident was usually just sexual. An estimated 40.1% said the sexual contact was
more like friends with benefits, and 13.6% said that they really cared about each other.

Among the 840 youth who experienced staff sexual misconduct WITHOUT FORCE, 5.1% reported the involvement of a male staff member (2.7% involved male staff only and 2.4% involved both male and female staff).

So the 95% that you cite is of MALE YOUTH who experience sexual misconduct involving FEMALE STAFF WITHOUT FORCE.

Hey, giving these boys a piece of candy should make it all better!

After all boys in a detention facility can give legitimate consent to their adult female captors.

I’ll remind you that Adele—if it is Professor Adele Mercier—wrote this rape apologia on an article arguing that men and boys can only legitimately talk about their issues in a feminist context.

The problem with asserting that men and boys can only talk about their issues in a feminist context should be starkly obvious by now.

Feminists are incapable of recognizing the victimization of men and boys in an honest way. Feminists are more invested in explaining away that victimization then they are in bringing awareness to it and funding services to address it.

And when I say feminists are incapable of recognizing the victimization of men and boys in an honest way, I mean men and boys full stop. The problems of men and boys full stop.

A woman saying that sexually abused boys in cages can give legitimate consent to their attackers is more welcome in feminism than a woman saying they are abuse victims. And that’s the fucking problem.

Feminism fails to produce an immune response to people like Adele Mercier. I guarantee she will experience no fallout, no censure and no disciplinary action for assertion that boys can give legitimate consent to the adult females in detention centres who have complete control over every aspect of their lives.

Can you imagine what would happen if Adele was Adam Mercier, professor of philosophy at Queens University. And Professor Adam Mercier publicly said that underage girls can give meaningful convent to their adult male teachers.

What do you think would happen to Adam Mercier for even suggesting that? He would lose his job at a bare minimum. All across Canada feminist protesters would erupt into “lolita” walks protesting his victim blaming. And we’d have even more “Don’t be that guy” campaigns to combat the epidemic of “rape culture.”

But because it wasn’t Adam Mercier, it was Adele Mercier, and because it wasn’t blaming underage girls for being sexually abused by men, it was blaming underage boys for being sexually abused by women, nothing will happen.

And that, friends, is exactly what Dr. Janice Fiamengo is talking about when she says “feminist double standards.”

Feminism fails to produce an immune response to Mercier—hell our institutions of learning and our government fail to produce an immune response to Adele Merceier—and all the people like her because feminism does not care about men and boys. And our government doesn’t care about men and boys. And our institutions of learning don’t care about men and boys.

Feminists want to control the discussion on issues faced by men and boys simply so they can strangle it to death in its crib.

Oh no, Adele won’t receive any sort of official reprisal, not from feminism or from her academic institution.

In fact I have a proposal for the Canadian Government. Instead of disciplining Adele for her rape apologia, she should be rewarded!

Currently the Canadian Government is giving the White Ribbon Campaign—a feminist or feminist friendly organization—600K to go into schools and tell boys to take responsibility for violence against women and girls.

600K to tell boys that they are the problem when it comes to violence! 600K that could have gone to mental health services to address the abuse that’s at the root of violent behaviour but that would be admitting that boys can be victims. And we can’t have that!

But why stop with making boys responsible for violence against women. Since Adele Mercier has demonstrated such a keen grasp of how to avoid recognizing boys are victims, perhaps the White Ribbon Campaign could partner with her and have go into schools and teach your son how he’s responsible for “misconduct” when he’s statutorily raped by his female teachers.

Seems like something the government of Canada could really get behind! And Adele certainly has a lot to say on the subject!

MALE DISPOSABILITY – SPC Ivan Lopez – pay me now or pay me later

Late in the day yesterday I started getting texts from my brother. My nephew was locked down in his barracks at Ft. Hood. By now we all know the rest of the story, of how a soldier named Specialist Ivan Lopez, who had been exhibiting problematic behavior, certainly symptomatic, probably that community especially should have picked up on….went off.

No one in his chain of command picked up on this enough to do anything in time – and by the way, the way the Army works is quite different from civilian employers and this is one example; intervening and dealing with this kind of thing is very much a leader responsibility. It was his leaders’ job all up the line to make sure this problem got identified and resolved, and unfortunately his leaders’ failure to do that is not anomalous.

We can either identify these guys, and take the trouble and shoulder the expense to help these people when it would make a difference, or we can bumble on and then get blindsided when the bill comes due, like we have this time. Pay me now or pay me later. Just remember, if you pay later, you may not like how the interest has piled up.

The inital speculation was that there was some kind of jihadi connection, because there had been warnings and indicators leading up to it. But it is probably going to turn out that this was unconnected, that it was something much more mundane and familiar, soemthing we have seen over and over. In fact this incident follows the “suicide by cop” pattern we are seeing in these shootings.

And here we should mention the professionalism and strength that cop showed in stopping SPC Lopez. He shot himself in the head right in front of her when she confronted him. To quote the post commander:

“It was clearly heroic what she did in that moment in time,” said Lt. Gen. Mark Milley, the post’s commander. “She did her job, and she did exactly what we’d expect of a United States Army military police.”

This is the kind of thing that makes me get impatient with most of the discussion around women in the military, so much of it from people whose understanding of war and what is involved in building and maintaining a military effort seems to come only from television or gaming. This soldier did the job assigned to her and her womanhood got in the way not at all. In war and in garrison that is all that matters. Now she can deal with the nightmares and hyper-vigilance she is likely to experience, like everyone else.

SPC Lopez seemed mellow and friendly to everyone, it looked like everything was fine. But it wasn’t. The issue now is why he was able to hide all this so well, and more than that, why he hid it at all. Why did he think he had to? I think we all know the answer to that, and it is the Army’s challenge to undo all the conditioning and enculturation that fed this.

We go along deploying people multiple times, on basically pointless, vague, high-sounding missions, a small, disposable segment of our society; and then when they crack the answer seems to be to reach for some way to blame them or “military culture” instead of the impossible situations the people we elect put them into and then wash their hands of.

It’s Shit Like this: Feminist Professor Mercier, did you argue that child sexual abuse isn’t real?

In a letter to the editor dated March 31, published in the Queens University Paper, Andrew Howard argues that men should not create their own spaces to address their issues outside of feminist oversight, I replied with an extensive list of statistics that feminists choose to ignore when creating their campaigns that present men as more likely to be rapists than rape victims.

One of those statistics was this:

95% of abused boys in juvenile facilities reported being attacked/coerced by female staff.

Sexual Victimization in Juvenile Facilities Reported by Youth, 2012

Adèle Mercier, Associate Professor. B.A., M.A. at Queens Univeristy(or someone posing as her), offers the following rebuttal to my presentation of that statistic.

Dear Alison,

I know that statistics can be hard to interpret, but you need to learn to read before you spread misinformation into the stratosphere.

You said: “95% of abused boys in juvenile facilities reported being attacked/coerced by female staff”. This is FALSE.

Re-read Google “Sexual Victimization in Juvenile Facilities Reported by Youth, 2012”

“Sexual victimization” is there defined as ALL SEXUAL ACTIVITY with facility staff.

And the numbers are that, among males in juvenile facilities:

5.2% of MALE YOUTH engage in unauthorized sexual activity with MALE STAFF;

89.1% of MALE YOUTH engage in unauthorized sexual activity with FEMALE STAFF;

3% of MALE YOUTH engage in unauthorized sexual activity with both male and female staff.

This merely reflects THE PROPORTIONS OF GAY AND STRAIGHT MALES in juvenile detention centers, (and the fact that even people in detention centers like to have sex.)

Also noteworthy:

“As a result of the high rate of staff sexual misconduct reported in the NSYC-1 (10.3%), new items were added to the NSYC-2 questionnaire to better understand the circumstances surrounding incidents. Youth were asked a series of questions related to their relationship with the facility staff prior to sexual contact. Among victims of staff
sexual misconduct:

Nearly two-thirds said that staff told them about their personal life outside of work (69.1%), treated them like a favorite or better than other youth (63.6%), or gave them a special gift that the staff would not have given to most other youth (62.3%). Almost half (49.2%) said the staff member gave them pictures or wrote them letters. Nearly a third (29.8%) said that the staff member contacted them in other ways when the staff member was not at the facility. More than a third (36.7%) said youth gave the staff member pictures of themselves, and more than a quarter (28.1%) said youth gave the staff member a special gift.

When youth were asked who initiated the sexual contact, 36.4% said that the facility staff always made the first move, 17.4% reported that the youth always made the first move, and 46.3% said that sometimes the facility staff made the first move and sometimes the youth did.

Youth were also asked to describe the sexual relationship with staff. Nearly half (46.3%) said the incident was usually just sexual. An estimated 40.1% said the sexual contact was
more like friends with benefits, and 13.6% said that they really cared about each other.

Among the 840 youth who experienced staff sexual misconduct WITHOUT FORCE, 5.1% reported the involvement of a male staff member (2.7% involved male staff only and 2.4% involved both male and female staff).

So the 95% that you cite is of MALE YOUTH who experience sexual misconduct involving FEMALE STAFF WITHOUT FORCE.

Of course ~90% of sexually abused boys in juvenile facilities reported a female attacker who used force. That means female staff physically attacked 90% of the boys abused by staff in juvenile detention facilities.

However I just want to highlight the fact that Professor Mercier’s–a feminist’s–defence of the female predators abusing underage boys in juvenile seems to comprise of the following rationale:

“He wanted it.” “He seduced her.” “He touched her first.”

Where have we heard these excuses before?

And all this on an article that argues feminists should have control over the discourse over men’s issues. Control over how these boys talk about their abuse when they grow up.

Well, according to one prominent feminist at Queens, it’s not really abuse at all!

(If Adèle Mercier is being impersonated, we invite her to contact us and we will issue a retraction.)

DOUBLE STANDARDS – Feminism’s sorry record on the subject of rape

It’s not unusual in the gender discussion to hear someone claim that feminism is horribly understood, that it isn’t man-hating or gender-biased at all; it’s really all about equality – see, it even says so right here in the dictionary. How valid an objection is this?

Let’s take one example, rape. Let’s look at feminism’s on the subject of rape. It turns out that the feminist handling of the subject of rape is one example of feminism’s opposition to an egalitarian discussion of gender. Domestic violence has been another, but that a discussion for another day

First, back in the 90s the standard feminist line of rape was that it was patriarchal violence to maintain the power system that governs gender. This developed put of Susan Brownmiller’s thesis which she enunciated in 1975 in Against Our Will. A logical extension of her position males, by definition, could not be rape victims. (The extension was logical but of course the proposition is not, being based on an illogical premise.)This was operationalized in rape victims services, where male child rape victims were often treated and lectured as if they themselves were rapists, to the point of being told they were the rapists, that they had really raped the woman who raped them. Toy Soldier experienced this and has written about the phenomenon in general.

Then later as consent became settled as the standard for defining rape – a very sane definition and a very good development – a new theoretical problem reared its head. What about men who didn’t consent to sex? Weren’t they rape victims too?

There were several responses to this challenge:

Agreement
One was acknowledgement of this and a refinement in the theory – basically there were feminists who said damn straight that’s rape and those men are rape victims. But they became an embattled minority….

Doubling Down with Rape Culture of Their Own
They were even called misogynist – apparently a woman has an absolute right to sex, however she likes it, from a man for these people and it’s misogynist of him to refuse. It’s like insulting her or something. When people talk about “feminist rape culture, this is the kind of thing they are referring to. Feminsts themselves have identified this problem.

Denial
By far the most common response was denial – “Well maybe women do rape men, but it’s a vanishingly small percentage of rapes.” This was a widespread response; there was advocacy research to back this up that did what it could to erase male victims. Mary Koss stands out particularly in this connection, both because of her insititutioanl influence over the discussiion and the voluminous discussion of her and her position. Google it if you care to see how voluminous it is. Or sometimes the feint was that if women did rape men, then somehow those men pressured their own rapists into raping them. The “erection as consent” canard got thrown in quite a lot.

Deflection
Another form this took was to deny that raped men suffer from the rape as much as women do, based on who knows what information or analysis. Another was a retread of the Patriarchy narrative above, where when a man was raped, or even a boy, it wasn’t the same, it wasn’t really rape, because of the power differential (You have to be a real believer to believe some boy has a power differential over a grown woman.) Hugo Schwyzer had a post several years ago to this effect, though he may have taken it down by now.

Deflection by accusation of deflection
A common attempt at deflection was to claim that talk of female rapists was intended only to deflect attention from the real problem, male rapists. No real evidence was ever offered to back up this mind-reading. The same accusation is often made of attempts to discuss false rape accusations.

Rape denial and rape apology
Everyone one of these responses were forms of rape denial, and one thing feminists have taught us is that rape denial is a part of rape culture. When people talk about “feminist rape culture, this is the kind of thing they are referring to.

Double standards
The sexist double standards – there literally two standards for what constitutes a rape victim, two standards for the degree of harm rape inflicts and two standards for when rape apology gets called rape apology, and a bitterly entrenched anti-egalitarianism in all these responses.

The feminist handling of the subject of rape is one example of feminism’s opposition to an egalitarian discussion of gender.

I doubt this is an exhaustive list. Please help expand it.

Honey Badger Radio: Sexual Assault In the Military

Having sniffed out yet another opportunity to shove shame down men’s throats till they choke, feminists are setting their sights on ending rape in the military.

As we all know feminists will handle this new experiment to remove rape from war—while keeping the killing—with their usual fairness and balance.

It’s a match made in heaven. The military can supply the lab rats—I mean captive audience—and the feminists can supply the emotional abuse.

Join the Honey Badgers as we discuss sexual assault in the military.

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